Over You
by urluvissuicide
Summary: One shot song-fic. Weeks after Lexie's funeral, Mark forces himself to visit her grave possibly finding closure.


**Weather man said it's gonna snow  
By now I should be used to the cold  
Mid-February shouldn't be so scary  
It was only December  
I still remember the presents, the tree, you and me**

He walked slowly, yet determined. Leaves and dead grass crunching under his feet. He tucked his neck deeper into the collar of his leather jacket, in efforts to fight the bite of the cold wind hitting his face. He tucked the bundle of pink roses under his arm, so he could shove his hands deep into his pockets.

Mark Sloan couldn't keep his mind from quickly flashing back to why he was walking in the direction he was headed.

"_Mark, I'm dying," her breathing, unsteady. _

"_What? No you're not," he shook his head,_

"_I am," she began to cry. "Please…tell Meredith…that I love her," she choked out, fighting for breath. "And that…. she was a.. good sister. And, please….tell my dad-"_

"_You're not dying," he stopped her. "You're gonna be fine,"_

_She moved her arm, slowly reaching towards him. "Hold my hand,_

"_No," he shook his head. "I'm not holding your hand, cause you're not dying,"_

"_Hold my hand," she whimpered. _

"_No, you're not dying. Do you hear me?" he looked at her sternly. "You don't die today," he moved to stand up. _

_Once more, he tried to pull the wreckage of the plane off of her. Butterflies filled his stomach when the realization that he wasn't strong enough to lift it overcame him. The beating of his heart became faster, not just because of the injury that he wasn't aware of, but because he could feel it break in half. _

_Falling to the ground once more, he laid across the cold ground and reached out to grab her hand. "I love you," _

_Lexie shook her head. "You don't….have to say it…just because I…said it,"_

"_I do," he shook his head furiously at her, speaking softly, "I love you. I love you, I've always been in love with you. I'll always be in love with you,"_

"_Yeah?"_

"_Which is why you have to stay alive," he clutched her hand with both of his. "We're gonna get married. You're gonna be an amazing surgeon," he nodded. "We're gonna have two or three kids,"_

"_So….Sof-ia…can have siblings,"_

"_Yeah, a sister and two brothers,"_

"_That's….nice.." she choked out, her eyes closed as she fought harder for breath. _

"_We're gonna be happy, Lex. You and me…we're gonna have the best life you and me. We're gonna be so happy," Tears built in his eyes as he heard her breaths become more uneasy. " So you can't die, okay? You can't die, cause we're supposed to end up together," he cried, looking into her eyes seeing her skin become more pale. "We're meant to be,"_

"_Meant…." she gasped once more, "Meant..to..be.." _

_Mark looked into her eyes, as the life left her body. The sparkle that was always in her eyes…the sparkle that he fell in love with slowly faded. His own body became racked with sobs as he reached out to gently close her eyes and touch her face once more. "I  
love you," he choked. "I love you, I love you, I love you," he rested his head against his hand which still tightly clasped hers and let the sobbing and grief over take him. _

**But you went away  
How dare you?  
I miss you  
They say I'll be OK  
But I'm not going to…ever get over you**

As Mark continued along his journey, snow flakes began to fall. He couldn't help but think back to a few hours ago.

He stood at the nurse's desk, filling out a patient chart when he felt a gentle nudge come from beside him. He turned his head, finding Meredith beside him. "Hi," he muttered.

"Hey," she forced a smile. "How are you?"

"I'm okay," he shrugged.

"You look like you've lost weight, have you been eating?"

"Look," he sighed and turned toward her. "I work, I spend time with Sofia, and I sleep. I'm fine,"

Meredith sighed and made a face. "I called you a few days ago,"

"I know," he nodded, putting his pen back to the chart infront of him.

"Mark," she reached out to rest a hand on his back. "I left four messages. Did you get any of them?"

Mark sighed and turned towards her, once more. "Look, I can't handle the constant phone calls asking how I'm doing…telling me that I'm gonna be okay. It's repetitive and a waste of time, so no I didn't listen to your messages,"

"I was calling to let you know that," she stammered. "The headstone," she sighed and bit her lip. She took a deep breath, fighting the tears from coming. "Lexie's headstone came in,"

Mark made a face, listening to her.

"My dad wanted you to know," she sighed. "He said he tried calling you, but he couldn't reach you either. Derek and I went to see it yesterday," she quickly wiped a tear from her cheek. "Seeing it actually helped, it gave me some closure that I needed. It just…kinda made it real,"

Mark nodded, took a breath, and turned away from her once more. "Thanks for letting me know,"

"There's something else," she pulled an envelope from her lab coat.

"What's that?"

"My dad was the one that came to my house and went through Lexie's things. I couldn't do it. Anyway, he found that in one of her journals," she slipped it into his pocket. "He didn't tell me what it said, just told me to make sure you got it,"

"Thanks,"

"You're welcome," she rubbed a hand across his back once more. "Do me a favor and go eat something," she turned to walk away.

Mark turned around in a swift movement and grabbed her hand, pulling her back to him he embraced her in a gentle hug.

**Living alone here in this place  
I think of you, and I'm not afraid  
Your favorite records make me feel better  
Cause you sing along  
With every song  
I know you didn't mean to give them to me**

Mark took a deep breath when he reached his destination. He had stood here weeks before, at her funeral. Only this time, there was a tall, ivory headstone.

"Hey you,"he spoke softly, tears building in his eyes. He knelt down to his knees, pulling the bundle of flowers from under his arm. "I brought you roses…pink ones…" he forced a smile, remembering how much she loved them. He laid them atop of the headstone, then reached out to gently run his fingers over the scroll work letters.

Alexandra Caroline Grey

Devoted daughter, sister, aunt, and friend.

Now, Our Guardian Angel

"Damnit, Lex," he couldn't fight the tears any longer. Suddenly, an intense wave of sadness enveloped him. He leaned against the headstone next to him as the snow began coming down in sheets around him.

**It really sinks in, you know,  
When I see it in stone**

"Mark…"

His eyes widened at the sight infront of him. She stood infront of him, wearing a flowing white dress. Her hair was curled and hung off her shoulders, covered in whisps of snowflakes. She was just as beautiful as she ever was. "Lex-"

"Shh.." she spoke softly, moving closer to him. She knelt down infront of him and reached to touch his cheek. She then reached for his hand, guiding it to his chest, where the envelope that Meredith had given him sat inside the pocket of his jacket.

Mark looked into her eyes and she moved closer to his face, just as he could feel her lips against his, with one swift movement she stood to her feet .

"Don't leave," he spoke softly through his tears.

"Goodbye, my love…" Lexie whispered softly and with one swift movement she stood up.

"Lexie!" he called once more.

She gently pointed towards his chest once more. "Goodbye, my love…" she repeated, before she disappeared into the snow and darkness.

Mark leaned his head back, trying to take a breath through his sobbing. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the envelope, opening it. Inside he found two pieces of folded up paper. One, a page from Lexie's journal.

_I need to tell Mark how I feel about him. I don't think I'm brave enough to do it in person. So, I've written a letter. Only, now I'm not so sure that I'm brave enough to send it. Oh dear God, by the time I tell him…it's going to be too late! What if it already is too late? He's with Julia…they seem so happy. I just don't know what to do!_

The other piece of paper was a piece of stationary, Mark unfolded it and before he could start reading it, he could hear Lexie's voice.

_Mark, _

_I love you. I love you so much that it hurts. I've always loved you. For months, every single day of my life has been consumed with thoughts of how my life should be…my life should be with you. I've heard people say that a person only has one great love in their life….Mark, you are mine. You're the one great love and I will forever carry in my heart. You are the man that no one else in my life will ever live up to. I know that you love me. I can see it every single time you look at me. I know that deep inside...your heart belongs to me. I just hope that we can find our way back to one another...someday.  
_

_I know that it may be too late, but I will forever love you. _

_ Love Always, _

_ Lexie_

"I love you too, Lex…" he spoke softly. "I love you,"

**Cause you went away  
How dare you?  
I miss you.  
They say I'll be okay,  
But I'm not going to ever get over you.**


End file.
